Dick Cheney the Iraq War Optimist

While Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid correctly maintains that the November elections were a referendum on Bush invading Iraq — over reasons the Prez lied about, no less — and that it’s a good idea to apply a tourniquet and bring the majority of troops home, the Vice President sees things differently…

After the weekly Republican policy lunch on Tuesday, Dick Cheney told the press:

What’s most troubling about Senator Reid’s comments yesterday is his defeatism. Indeed, last week he said the war is already lost. And the timetable legislation that he is now pursuing would guarantee defeat.

Dick Cheney is a Robot!Yep, that Dick Cheney is quite the optimist. His comments yesterday reminded me of some things he said last year, when I got to spend an entire day with Darth Cheney.

Dick Cheney on the RMS Titanic:

The most troubling thing about the Titanic survivors was their defeatism.

If those selfish women and children had been less eager to occupy a lifeboat — if they would have got out and pushed — that luxurious feat of nautical engineering would have made it back to port.

Dick Cheney on the explosion aboard the LZ 129 Hindenburg:

At the time, it was the largest aircraft ever built. Unfortunately, the passengers and crew were all defeatists, which guaranteed loss of the zeppelin.

If I had been the captain, I would not have settled with the ship and crew burning up…I would have told them to blow harder, at the base of the flames.

Dick Cheney on the slow-paced construction of the Empire’s new Death Star:

The lack of faith and rampant defeatism in the stormtroopers is troubling. The new Death Star will be complete and operational on schedule.

Even if the rebels blow it to bits no larger than Bush’s peanut-sized brain, we’ll use a surge of hammers and nails to get back on schedule…the biggest surge of hammers and nails this galaxy has ever seen!

[tags]Dick Cheney, Harry Reid, Iraq War, Titanic, Hindenburg, Death Star[/tags]

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11 Responses to Dick Cheney the Iraq War Optimist

  1. deadissue says:

    Funny stuff! Like I said at deadissue, I’m psyched that Cheney’s running point on the Iraq debate…couldn’t ask for anything better.

    THIS may be what the war czar was going to be doing right about now.

    Pretty dawgone pathetic that Cheney is the “ace in the hole” at this point.

  2. Gunfighter says:


    Joe, I just wanted to say thanks for dropping by at my blog a couple of weeks ago. I agree with your comments.



  3. JoeC says:

    Gunfighter: My pleasure! (For those of you who don’t know, Gunfighter regularly wears kilts, admires James T. Kirk, really is a gunfighter, and…oh, yeah, he’s got a nice blog, too!)

  4. James says:

    Oh spot on!!! Thanks for getting me to laugh my ass off. My favorite one was the Death Star bit. OMG Furkin’ hilarious!!!

  5. James says:

    I forgot to add that seeing Dick show up at the mic and fulfill his role as attack dog the other day made me think of Joseph Goebbels and his position of disseminating propaganda to perfection as seen in the “Big Lie” technique.

  6. JoeC says:

    James: Glad to oblige :-) Man, Cheney’s been caught and documented on so many outright lies, I can’t believe anybody believes a word out of his mouth anymore. Or do they?

  7. La Sirena says:

    Hey! I love the way you stick it to Darth Cheney, Evil Puppet Master … but wait…

    It seems I sneezed sometime yesterday and missed the unreporting of Dennis Kucinich beginning the Articles of Impeachment against Cheney — but then withdrawing them b/c Cheney had a heart scare and went to the hospital.
    Also, Pelosi was vocally NOT behind it. Google it. There are about 3-5 vague reports.

  8. JoeC says:

    I caught the unreporting that Kucinich was going to file, but hadn’t heard he withdrew the articles…wouldn’t it be strange if Cheney resigns “due to medical issues” instead of face trying to refute the impeachment articles?

  9. La Sirena says:

    Now I’m reading that Kucinich has entered the A of I. It seems like this story is being deliberately left alone and muddied. Also, Kucinich uses the word “blow” twice in the text of Cheney’s impeachment. If it was intended, Kucinich may have won me over with his sword of ironic justice.

    Don’t forget to call congress and attend an a28 picnic Saturday to send the message that it’s time for Cheney to answer for the havoc he hath wrought.

  10. JoeC says:

    The text is incriminatingly impressive…wow, when you look at the list of Cheney’s documented outright deceiving lies that Kucinich has put together, it’s pretty damning: Impeachment Articles.pdf.

    Where the heck IS the news media on this???????

    We really are behind the Media Industrial Complex Curtain…

  11. pelmo says:

    Ok everyone go stand in the corner since none of you took the time to watch Bill Moyer wednesday night. Even I gave up a half hour of Lost to watch it to its conclusion. If you would have watched it you would see why most things are left unreported in the news and it gave journalists a big black eye for their conduct. There was a lot of between the lines information.

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