When They Were Young: The Bush Administration
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When I grow up I want to get a DUI, dodge the draft, and become President so I can decide which city I’m gonna let drown and which country your sons and daughters will invade to get me and Daddy some more oil.
~George W. Bush |
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When I grow up I want to get two DUIs, dodge the draft, profit from war, and feel the rush of getting drunk and shooting an attorney in the face with a 28 gauge shotgun. I want to grow bald and wear a permanent evil and twisted little crooked snarl. Now, F’ off!
~Richard B. Cheney |
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When I grow up I want to create a fictional common enemy to unite the country by using rhetoric with a great deal of ominous-sounding smoking guns and mushroom clouds. I’ll persistently refuse to talk to any nation who won’t give me everything I want when I demand it.
~Condoleezza Rice |
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When I grow up, I want to steal elections, seek revenge by leaking the name of CIA agents, and have the President affectionately call me Turd Blossom.
~Karl Rove |
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When I grow up I want to shock and awe with extensive collateral damage. I want to know that I know where the nonexistent weapons of mass destruction are not, and to be fired for being the best gosh-darn Secretary of Defense ever.
~Donald Rumsfeld |
Read More: George W. Bush, Condoleezza Rice, Karl Rove, Richard Cheney, Donald Rumsfeld
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December 18th, 2006 at 7:50 am
Great post.
January 13th, 2007 at 2:37 pm
Is this some sort of hitlist???? I’m confused
January 13th, 2007 at 4:41 pm
Michael: This is definitely NOT some sort of hitlist. It’s an attempt at humor with a message, executed (no pun intended with your hitlist comment…) by taking members of the Bush administration and mixing it up with Monster.com’s famous Superbowl Advertisement idea.
Just to refresh your memory, Monster’s ad was shot in black-and-white and featured a series of children saying things like, “When I grow up . . . I want to be a yes-man,” and ” . . . forced into early retirement.” The message: Find a better job at Monster.com.
The irony in the ad was that most people as kids would never strive to be doing some of the things they are currently doing as adults. Likewise, the message I was trying to get across is that most of the members of the Bush administration would probably never have desired as kids to be doing things they have done in the past few years as adults.
Even if the humor fails, a lot of people—including me—find young pictures of famous people interesting, and I thought others would too.
Thanks for dropping by!
January 13th, 2007 at 5:33 pm
Ya’ know, my wife just told me the “hitlist” comment was a joke, and upon second look, I think I took it too seriously. But, I’ve had a relative who worked in the Secret Service, and have heard what they’re required to do when there’s a threat; I just wanted to make sure I’m not spending my MLK holiday answering three hours of formulaic questions downtown ;-)
January 26th, 2007 at 12:03 am
[…] And don’t miss When They Were Young: The Bush Administration. […]
March 3rd, 2007 at 8:27 pm
Hi Joe,
I just popped over here from your “Santa Claus Test”. What a hoot! I sent that out to a bunch of friends (including starched shirt consevratives) in preparation for the coming season.
All the best!
John
May 10th, 2008 at 3:58 pm
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